


I'm Not That Fragile

by flowercrowncurls



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: First Kiss, Fluff, Good Theo Raeken, IED, Liam Dunbar Has Anger Issues, M/M, Mentioned Corey Bryant - Freeform, Rapping Theo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-05
Updated: 2018-09-05
Packaged: 2019-07-07 06:00:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15902304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flowercrowncurls/pseuds/flowercrowncurls
Summary: Liam's still got anger issues.  Theo is talented in the art of distraction, even when it's not on purpose.  Liam questions his own intelligence more than once. They always figure it out in the end though.





	I'm Not That Fragile

**Author's Note:**

> inspo. Fragile (TechN9ne cover by Cody Christian and Kenny Kynoch)

Liam barrels his way through the front door legs getting tangled in the bags he's carrying. He huffs in annoyance as he stumbles nearly face planting into a wall before he manages to free himself and throws the offending bags aside. He glares at the pile of bags like they've personally offended him before he turns towards the stairs and his glare intensifies, he's going to break Theo's nose, maybe even more than once, for forgetting him. Liam had told Corey nearly a dozen times before, during and even after practice that he didn't need a ride, he was fine. He remembers rolling his eye when Corey seemed skeptical before he'd offered up that Theo didn't have work today so he'd be there to get Liam, he promised that he was fine as Corey had drug himself from the locker room. And then, THEN Theo had gone and not shown up at all. 

Liam growled lowly, stalking his way up the stairs and down the hall towards guest room that had become Theo's bedroom over the past few months. Liam could feel the anger bubbling under the surface, disproportionate rage boiling as he thought about the five miles he'd had to walk home, dragging his school things, his lacrosse gear, a whole bag of books Theo had asked Liam to get from Lydia's mom. Liam's hands curl into fist, knuckles brushing against his biceps as he crosses his arms and stands at the top the stairs. He stares down the hall, eyes shifting between blue and yellow, mouth curling down at the corners, jaw clenched. He feels the anger, coming in like a tidal wave, lapping at his ankles and whispering against the back of his neck, curling around his fists and festering in between each rib. It feels like a deep dark spiral, smoke in his lungs as he tries to breath through the emotions. _The sun, the moon, and the truth_ repeating like a broken record through his mind, words like dust on his tongue as he tries to swallow back the anger. 

He's justifiably upset, but the rage simmers like a black cloud and he knows it always pushes for more. Higher and higher, harder and harder. Uncontrollable and unreliable, and he regrets that linger for weeks after each episode is the only thing keeping him rooted where he stands. Its the only thing that's keeping him from marching down the hall, kicking the door down and pummeling Theo until the rage settles, until his wolf stops prowling and snapping its jaws, until his thoughts quiet and his heart steadies. 

So he stands there, fists trapped against his chest, and counts backwards from 10 mantra repeated after each number. He takes a handful of deep breaths and then recites the alphabet backwards for good measure. When he feels more in control and less likely to actually rip Theo's arms off he starts to trudge down the hallway. The door to Theo's room is partially open. He barely acknowledges the soft beat of music but completely disregards the older boy's right to privacy as he presses his palm against the wood of the door and pushes. 

Liam doesn't go into Theo's room often, he knows the boy hasn't had much of his own space since he was a small child and he knows what it means to Theo to have that now. To have a space that is completely his own, a place he can do what he wants, whenever he wants - within reason. So, Liam toes the line of the doorway, an invisible line he still struggles to cross, as he looks up towards the other and his mouth opens and then just gets caught there in limbo half open without a single word to utter. Every word he's been reciting since he left the school has fled his mind entirely as he stares at Theo standing in the middle of his room, back to the doorway and wearing a black snapback. The sight of the hat covering Theo's hair throws Liam so off balance that he's halting mind step, hand still pressed to the wood as he tries to wrap his head around the image that Theo is creating. Liam tries to remember if he's ever seen Theo in a snapback. 

He comes up blank. 

He can remember a handful of times he's seen the boy bury too long locks underneath a beanie, that time he had gone to drop off something to Theo at the garage only to find the boy with a bandanna holding back curls from his eyes, the time he'd come home from Mason's late one Saturday to Theo and Lydia sprawled across the couch watching some embarrassingly sappy romance movie, which in itself isn't odd the two of them had quickly formed a very close bond, but the older boy's hair was held back with a silver elastic headband that Liam could have sworn was Lydia's. But no matter how much he wracks his brain he can't remember a time he's ever seen him in a snapback and it does something to Liam - something he's been fighting against for half a year. Something just like the first time he'd seen the chimera wearing Liam's away lacrosse jersey at a Friday home game cheering in the stands alongside Mason. Something like when Liam ran into Theo in the hallway, the older boy covered only by a towel wrapped around his waist and hair dripping water across his broad shoulders. And he kind of feels the urge to punch the older boy in the jaw over the way he's making him feel. Liam frowns, wishes he was strong enough to look away but knowing he's always been a little too weak when it comes to Theo. 

It's just that Theo looks like such a stereotypical teenage boy and its a concept that Liam knows to be true but still struggles to wrap his head around. He knows objectively that Theo is only a year older than him, that Theo is still technically a teenager at the age of 19 but there's something about the way he looks standing there in his room wearing a snapback that seems so painfully normal that it leaves Liam a little breathless. And he finds himself wanting to reach for the boy to run fingers over the sharp edge of his jaw and down over the soft skin of his neck, curling his fingers into the ends of Theo's grown out hair and tugging softly. Liam shakes his head, face squishing in annoyance as he tries to bully those thoughts right out of his head but then he shifts his attention to Theo in the dark tank top, arms on full display and he just feels personally attacked. 

He startles when Theo speaks, hand pressing over the center of his chest as he tries to slow his heart rate, and it takes him a long moment for his brain to catch up with the rest of him. Theo isn't talking, not really at least, he's rapping. Liam recognizes the song, he's heard it a couple dozen times whenever Theo has given him a ride somewhere. There's something to the way Theo's voice curls around the words that pulls him in a little closer, softly stepping into the room, practically holding his breath as he just stares openly. Theo seems so caught up in the song, encompassed by the lyrics as he spits them along to the beat of the song, harsh and deep and clear. His hands are moving along with the words as if Theo is compelled to move, like he just can't help himself, energy bursting from him in a way Liam is pretty sure he's never witnessed before. 

Theo is so animated, so bright and almost blinding in a confident sort of way that settles over your bones and makes you feel steady, comfortable. Whatever words Liam had rehearsed during his arduous walk home have long since died on the tip of his tongue. He rocks onto his heels fingers curling around the hem of his sweater as he just holds on and tries not to drown in the way Theo's voice carries and curves around words, silver tongue put to work as the boy casually folds his way through a pile of laundry. Looking relaxed and comfortable and completely himself, this is Theo without pretense, without mask, without wall or humor or manipulation. This is Theo as he was meant to be all along, before he'd allowed himself to be taken, and twisted, and used. Something in Liam aches. 

**_You don't really get why I'm so pissed? Understand this (Understand this)  
I'm an artist, and I'm sensitive about my shit, yes I'm_ **

Theo just fades into breathing as the track transitions into the chorus, his voice fading as the beat changes and he moves along with it, shoulders rocking slightly and head bobbing along. His chest is heaving slightly, like he's just been running or working out. But to Liam it looks more like he's letting go of a million different things weighing him down, like he's giving in and freeing himself from shackles that usually hang heavy around his wrists. Liam shuffles forward a few more steps, knows just how distracted Theo is because he still hasn't realized Liam is there. Theo sings along to a few lines of the chorus, voice low and more talking than singing but it still causes heat to flare across Liam's chest, spreading out like a wildfire as it licks over the surface of his skin and curls in his gut. 

Theo is so attractive that Liam has started to wage war against his own body, forcing himself not to move any closer, not to lift his arm and touch, not to press himself up against the broad expanse of the older boy's back. Theo grabs a sweatshirt from the pile just holding it for a long minute, if Liam were less distracted he would realize that it's one of his - one that's been missing for over a month, one he thought he'd left on the bus after an away game. But Liam is too busy staring at all the bits of Theo he can see, drinking him in as the beat of the song shifts again and then Theo's back to rapping along. 

Liam watches as Theo just comes to life, exploding like a million supernovas as he throws the sweatshirt back down and throws himself into the verse. He sounds overcome, anger and frustration and thousands of unvoiced complaints bursting from him. Words that sound like regrets and apologies and pleas fall from between teeth and lip, curling around tongue that pushes them out into the open. Liam can feel it building, can almost feel the waves of Theo's emotions as they cascade around the room slapping against the walls like waves on the beach. Liam's fingers itch for his phone, he wants to grab this moment and keep it locked away, wants to be able to pull it up again and lose himself in everything Theo is, in this moment, all over again. 

He gives in, fingers shoved into his pocket and seconds later he is sliding his finger across the screen, switching to his camera app and recording. What feels like a lifetime in between seconds rushes forward and Liam can see Theo close his eyes, head tilting forward as he bites through the words and rips them to shreds with his teeth. Theo starts to move a little more then, whole upper body rocking with the beat as his hand moves fast enough to blur the recording. Liam jumps, wide eyed as Theo suddenly turns towards the door eyes shifting open as his voice shutters and stalls around a single breath as he takes in Liam appearance. The younger boy standing there looking a mixture of simmering annoyance and awe and something Theo avoids naming because it makes his chest ache and his stomach clench. Theo narrows in on the phone held out in front of the other boy and he feels every wall slam back up, including all the ones Liam's already long since bullied his way through. 

The silence stretches, causing Liam to squirm where he stands and a soft blush to take over his face. He opens his mouth, but he doesn't have a single word to say. There's not enough words in the english language to explain what the hell he's doing standing there quietly recording Theo like a creep. Or how watching Theo disconnect makes him feel sick to his stomach. His heart is pounding and his hands start to shake as he drops them to his side. 

"What - Are you recording me?" Theo looks puzzled, then uncertain, cautious in a way that Liam hates. He looks down at his hand where it's curling tightly around his phone, hand just shy of too tight - any tighter and Liam knows the device with bend and crack and shatter in his hand. It all feels a bit like a metaphor for his life in this moment and he shivers with the implications of what he's just done, a million and one thoughts racing through his mind as his brain finally manages to catch up with the rest of him. He doesn't want to delete it, knows logically that's what he should offer to do. But he just can't. And he hates himself in this moment, more than he ever has before. 

Regret and guilt swirl in his gut, anger rolling in his blood as he stares at the wall over Theo's shoulder. 

Theo was so real, so young and free, like nothing in the world could bother him in that moment - like he wasn't caught up in a past he can't seem to forgive himself for and nightmares he can't outrun and forgiveness that doesn't come as easily as expected. Theo had never seemed more real than in that moment, uncensored and just allowing himself to be. Liam forgets how to breathe, long seconds stretching out in front of him as he just lets himself be overwhelmed, his senses bursting to life. He feels a little like he's suffocating, consequences wrapping their greedy hands around his neck and squeezing tight enough to make him choke and cough. 

"Liam!" Theo calls, voice toeing the line of annoyance and uncertainty. 

"You forgot me," Liam whines, reproaching petulance is apparently what he is going with because he has fully lost all ability to function like a normal human being and his terrified, nervous default has always been angry accusation. Those weren't the words he wanted to use, there are a handful of other things he would have rather said but he has little control over his mouth at the best of times, and now is not one of his best moments. 

"I - What?" Theo looks puzzled which Liam really doesn't blame him for, he's never wanted to punch himself in the face more than he does in this moment right here with Theo standing there looking like something straight out of one of his secret fantasies and staring at Liam like he's some sort of alien life form. 

"Lacrosse," Liam offers, shoulders lifting in some version of a pathetic shrug as he pulls his eyes away from the older boy. He shuffles on his feet, moving closer to the door. 

"Oh..." Theo's voice evens, softens around the edges in that way it does when he talks to Liam sometimes like he's a soft, scared puppy that needs to be coddled. Liam hates it. It makes him feel like a small child, like Theo is looking down at him and seeing all the terrified, ugly, cut open parts of him. "I'm sorry." 

"Yeah, it's.. yeah." Liam finishes voice shifting closer to his security blanket anger, and he finds himself in some sort of limbo wondering if he should just make a run for it. Fight or flight instincts at their very worst. He does not really think the situation could get much worse and he is almost positive that Theo will be too surprised by Liam's new found levels of idiocy to even chase after him. He gets to the doorway and then suddenly he is being slammed against the wall, brains rattling, as he takes a moment to realize his body had evidently decided on flight before his brain had a chance to play catch up. Liam stares up at Theo, flailing the second he realizes the older boy has him trapped between his own body and the wall. Liam tries to fight his way out, pushing and pulling and shoving but Theo is a solid wall of muscle that doesn't budge an inch.

"Liam," Theo whispers softly, in that voice again, all soft and calm and patient. Liam wishes he had more control but he's nothing more than an impulsive bundle of nerves and repressed emotions. And so instead of words, his eyes glint to yellow and he growls, anger vibrating through him, a well-known protective shell for all the fear he's drowning in. But Theo knows him too well, knows him better than Liam knows himself sometimes. He's always been able to look at Liam and see right through him, maybe it's his history - years of having to read people, learning how to manipulate and pull out every secret, every truth, every word and emotion and deep dark hidden thing. Maybe it's a reflection of how much Liam just cares, about and for the older boy. Maybe it's just something intrinsically Theo, something in the very foundation of his make-up, the deep down there part that is still human and has been clawing its way to the surface for the past year. 

Whatever it is, Liam hates it in the same way he loves it. 

"Why did you record me?" Theo questions, just shifting and bulldozing over Liam like usual, bypassing all his angry parts like they don't even matter, like they are irrelevant, like Liam isn't vibrating with the urge to smash Theo's face until it turned a shade of purple that would ultimately fade too quickly. 

Liam knows, there are a multitude of ways he could steer this conversation. He could claim it was for blackmail, claim it was to send to Mason and Corey because they would never ever believe Liam if he told them, could say it was because Theo was good and Liam wanted to exploit him on social media. He could try to laugh it off like he wasn't recording him, that he just happened to have his phone out when he'd been dumbfounded by Theo singing and folding clothes like a house wife. He could say it was because Theo seemed actually human, like a real boy. He could say it was because Theo was really fucking good looking and Liam just has no self control. 

But Liam knows that none of those are the real reason. 

He'd wanted to keep this moment for himself, to remind himself how far Theo has come, how much he's changed. He wanted to stop time in that second and just drown himself in the way that Theo looked, the way he moved, the way he sounded as he threw himself into something with a sort of single-minded passion Liam hasn't seen from him since he was being an evil douchebag. He wanted to lock up this part of Theo that Liam is positive no one else has seen, take it out and remind himself he got to see Theo like this, that this was his Theo. 

His Theo who smiled like moonlight and laughed like the rising tide, who fought like he had nothing to lose and cared like he might never be allowed to again. His Theo who drank his coffee black with flushed cheeks and unruly hair, his Theo who worked hard and held on to every second chance he was given like it was a lifeline securing him to Earth. 

Liam knows its because he cares, he wants, he _loves_. 

"Fuck it," Liam murmurs, figuring he may as well just go all out. He rocks up onto his tiptoes, watching as Theo's eyes go a little cross eyed as Liam pushes further into his space. He thinks he sees it the moment Theo realizes what's about to happen, his blue-green eyes go a little wide, his cheeks flush with color, his chest heaves with a deep breath as his mouth opens around a word that never gets set free. Because Liam is rushing forward, smashing his mouth almost painfully hard against Theo's as he curls his hands around the back of the older boy's neck and holds on for dear life. Theo startles, stiffens, but just as Liam is thinking this is it, my nose is about to be broken Theo makes a choked off noise and tilts his head, slotting their mouths together more comfortably as he leans down, leans in, pushes closer and thoroughly devours Liam. 

Liam whines, throws his arms over Theo's shoulders and just holds on tight, gets swept up in the rushing river that is Theo as he takes him apart and puts him back together, piece by piece.


End file.
